An Interview with Batman Drew

Recently, Drew was given a toboggan hat that has Batman symbols on it. Donning said hat, transforms him into a snarly faced super hero known as "Batman Drew." He gets so into character that a couple of weeks ago, someone was praying for him and he kept interrupting with, "My name's Batman Drew...Batman Drew. Did you hear me? I said it's Batman Drew." Interesting how hard it is to keep a hand clamped over the mouth of a squirming child...

Anyway, recently he has agreed to a couple of interviews so that the world can have a better understanding of the magnitude of his powers. The latest one, I thought I'd record here so that you all could get a glimpse into the most fearsome 3 year old super hero that the world has ever seen.

M: What is the most important thing that everyone should know about you?

BD: Just that I AM Batman Drew. That's all.

M: What is it exactly that you do?

BD: I fight bad guys and save people. One time, I even had to save my Dad because some Jokers were trying to get to him.

M: Who made you Batman Drew?

BD: I made myself Batman Drew because that's my job. I have to do it.

M: Do you have a secret identity?

BD: No, I just tell people that I'm Batman; they need to know that.

M: Who is the worst bad guy that you have to fight?

BD: A joker.

M: Let's talk about some fun facts about Batman. What is Batman Drew's favorite color?

BD: Batman's is black...but Drew's is green.

M: What is your favorite car to drive?

BD: I don't have my wallet's license yet. When I get a little bit older maybe I'll do that...wait, dos Batman 'pposed to have a driver's license??

Hold on! I'll be back...I have to rescue some people!!!

(loud jumping, yelling and fight noises can be heard. then he is suddenly back in his seat.)

Sorry, some people needed rescuing so I had to save them.

M: So, do you have a sidekick that helps you when you go to rescue people?

BD: Yes. I have Carter. He is an imaginary dinosaur.

M: What are some of your super powers that help you in a fight?

BD: I'm an expert fighter. I'm good with lots of weapons. I'm super fast, I have strong powers and I can't get hurt.

M: If you could do anything, what would you do?

BD: Rescue people. That's my job to do.

Well folks, there you have it. It sounds like the world is a safer place tonight with such a dedicated super hero in our midst. I feel safer anyway, don't you?

Aardvarks, Large Words and Reckless Sledding

Jesse reminded me of a story that needed to be blogged and since it is rather short, I thought I would go ahead and write down several at once. After all...if I forget to write them down, how am I ever going to write a book about my amazing child? (Stage Mom Much??? Maybe....) So, I have a few more Drew funnies to add to the collection.

A couple of days ago after a nap, Drew was curled up in my lap and rather grumpy. Whether he was grumpy because he was still sleepy or because I had just informed him that we weren't watching TV right then, I'm not entirely certain (maybe both). His blank stare at the remote however, caused him to notice it was full of numbers and letters. We started talking about which numbers and letters they were, when he suddenly jumped up and shouted, "Mom!! I can't be talking about this right now! I can't be talking about this right now because I don't know what an AARDVARK is!!!" I can assure you that despite the fact I was shaking with laughter, the next several minutes were spent in joint research on the computer so that my 3 year old could adequately explain what an aardvark is...should anyone ever ask.

I love the fact that he is fascinated by large and unusual words. He always says them with such an exaggerated inflection too that I can't help but be amused. His newest is "marvelous". As in, "Mommy, this is a marvelous cake. It is the best one I had ever ate!"

Speaking of food, apparently the old saying, "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach" becomes applicable at a very early age. Until recently, I have not made an effort to cook a full meal unless Jesse was going to be home and with his schedule at SYC, that doesn't happen very often. I was in the mood to cook last week though and so one night I just cooked for Drew and I. The child proceeded to shovel in an entire plate of homemade macaroni, vegetable medley and chicken (nuggets, that is, since he refuses to acknowledge anything else as "real" chicken) as if he had never seen a full plate of food. He then moved on to climbing all over my lap, hugging and kissing and saying, "You're such a sweet mommy. You're the best mommy ever. Did you know you were so nice??? You cooked a meal just for me and you. Just for me and you!! You're such a nice mommy....you're even the best mommy ever." Clearly, only cooking when Jesse is at home is a thing of the past.

Also a thing of the past is my ability to keep the little monkey's adrenaline seeking behavior at bay. We went sledding at his best friend's house a couple of weeks ago and made a trail with the 4 wheeler and snow plow. He and Jim managed to jump the trail in the sled and were headed straight for the water truck. Jim jumped out, we were all screaming at Drew to jump off and running to try and catch him in time. The boy waited until right before he hit the truck and then just laid down in the sled and slid right under the truck and out the other side! That was frightening enough but being the mommy of a preschooler (and not a much older child), I assumed it was all an accident and he was just as scared as I was. While not wanting him to be scared, I decided that it was probably a good thing it had happened so that he knew to be more cautious next time. Imagine my surprise a couple of days later when suddenly out of the blue he asked, "Mom, how come you guys were yelling at me to jump off? I was just going to go under the truck...that's what I wanted to do." Somehow I'm going to have to come to terms with the fact that this child is genetically predisposed to be reckless and rush seeking. GRrrrr....

At the moment, Drew is running around, armed with a Nerf sword and showing severe dissapointment that he can't seem to unearth any evil doers that need slaying. Not to worry though, his imagination is vivid and his vocabulary is great, I'm sure at any moment this situation will be rectified and more blog material will magically appear.

Dear Man Child

Dear Precious Little Man Child,

I've decided that there is something important you need to know. We focus a lot of time on the fact that you are precious, that you are my gift from God, that mommy always wanted a little boy and I could not be happier that God gave me you. We spend a lot of time on this because it is all very true and always will be. I think it is important that your rotten little self knows why we spoil you so rotten.

However, I seem to have missed an essential detail so far in all of our talks and it appears that it is time to remedy that. You see, just as I am so very blessed (beyond blessed even) to have you, you lucked out in the "mommy of a boy" department. Long before you were born, I was a die hard football fan...and speaking of Die Hard, I believe that it is one of the greatest movies ever. I love just about any action movie (the bigger the gun and explosion, the better). I eat guy food, watch super hero movies, and have no issue with jumping into a game of tackle football. I love boy noise and as you get older, I can easily foresee our house full of boys being fed chili, hot dogs and an abundance of baked goods. I will rough house, sword fight, or play the damsel in distress if needed. I will cheer you on as you run, jump, climb and tackle your Daddy all over the house and when he is working late nights or gone on youth retreats, I will stand in his place (at least until you're 8 and as big as I am).

I say all of this to say, as badly as I want a little girl, I'm pretty well cut out to be the mother of boys. I mean, I even listened to you talking about shooting Geeda's gun over Christmas break without having a panic attack. There is still that one little issue that we seemed to have forgotten though and I guess now is as good a time as any. So here it is, I will never and I do mean NEVER be ok with walking into the bathroom and dragging my pants leg and foot through a puddle of pee. Hit the toilet...or else.

Love,

Momma

When I Get Big

Drew is talking more and more about what he wants to do when he's a grown up or when he gets big. Yesterday was a particular funny day though because he was constantly changing his mind...either that or he is going to have quite a hectic life which will require acrobatic skills that are, as of yet, undiscovered by man.

He started off the morning by saying, "When I get big, I'm going to be a construction worker with Uncle Aaron." (A couple of questions revealed that he was not talking about Uncle Aaron but Uncle Jake. The boy has the frustrating task of keeping straight 3 uncles who happen to look a lot alike.) "Jake can drive the tractors but I'm going to take care of the big dump trucks," he added.

About an hour later, he had changed his mind. "When I get big, I'm going to be a firefighter! I'm not going to drive that firefighter truck that came to preschool though...I'm gonna get my own one!"

After church we were headed home when he started talking about swimming with sharks, and fish and boats in the water. I asked if he was talking about the ocean. "Yes," he answered, "and I'm going to need those flapper things on my feet to help me swim fast." He continued to list parts of scuba gear that he would need and then said, "When I get big, I'm going to swim under water and catch sharks like Uncle Aaron (which he happened to get right that time)."

Jesse was checking the scores of the Bears game while I was cooking lunch. Drew proceeded to say either the saddest, or most promising thing I've ever heard. "When I get big, I'm going to be a faughtball player. I'm going to have a Bears helmet and a Bears shirt and even Bears shoes!" I can't decide whether to be sad that he could have a life of disappointment as a Bears fan or ecstatic that he can be the answer to many earnest prayers from Bears fans...maybe we should groom him for quarterback...

Yesterday evening we were headed to Billings when suddenly he said, "Dad, when I'm a grown up you're going to teach me how to drive. I have to be big though. I'm going to be cuge (huge)! I'm going to be fumongous!" As the mom who feeds this little giant, I'd have to agree with his prediction.

This morning we were back to being a firefighter...the day is early yet though...and his imagination his "fumongous"!

"And To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street"

To the average person, this picture would seem odd. There is nothing artistic about it and all it contains is a seemingly random collection of rocks. However, there is much more to it than what meets the eye. What if I told you that the flat, round rocks on the bottom were actually fossilized dinosaur poop? Or what if I told you that the odd shaped rock on the far left was, in reality, a fossilized dinosaur teething toy, belonging to a larger dinosaur species? And the green and white one in the middle? It was the favorite toy of a small, baby dinosaur a very long time ago and now it has become a fossil. You might say that I'm crazy or delusional at best but that would be if you heard it strictly from me. However, I have it on good authority, in fact from a particular 3 year old little scientist, that it is 100% undeniably true.

Want to hear some more? Because, as many of you can attest, I could go on for days with stories that my little monkey has told me. For instance, there was the time that he came home from preschool at the age of 2 years, 2 months and informed me that he and Tristan (his best friend in TX) were going to steal the school's pumpkin patch, load it on the Boy Scout bus, drive the bus to a helicopter, load the pumpkin patch onto the chopper and then fly off with it. Tell me, where would a child of that age come up with that and be able to clearly verbalize it?

There was also the time that Jesse, Drew and I were headed to Billings. All of the sudden, Drew started screaming from the back that we had to turn around and go home; we had forgotten Carter. After arguing for a few minutes that Carter would be fine at home for a while (and getting absolutely nowhere), Jesse had the brilliant idea to tell Drew to call him. Suddenly Drew was all smiles, "Oh good Carter! You caught up with us...its a good thing you're a dinosaur and you can run fast and you climbed in the window. I missed you!"

I was thinking about these things tonight as I was reading Drew a bedtime story. Before he was born and while he was still a baby, I had all of these preconceived notions about what our favorite stories would be. I was going to read him "I'll Love You Forever" and "Guess How Much I Love You" and "I Love You Through and Through" (which, incidentally I did read to him for a long time and have been quoting it for about 3 years now). Since he's been old enough to have an opinion though, he has always loved Dr. Seuss. The wild and outlandish tales about unidentifiable creatures and far fetched adventures just appeal to his zealous little imagination and best of all is "And To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street".

This tale about Marko, a little boy with a wild imagination attempting to concoct "a tale that no one can beat" makes me smile. Every time I read it, I glance down at my sleepy eyed but enraptured little man and wonder what his next tale will be. The stories I thought I would be reading are sweet and certainly have their place but when it comes to the perfect bedtime story for Drew we have one that simply can't be beat..."And To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street".

Amidst the Noise

Normally, I go about my days with my wild little monkey running around and leaving chaos as he goes. So, when we got our new kitty a couple of weeks ago, I thought that it couldn't possibly be much different. Besides, my heart that has been aching for a baby for so long was just thrilled at the idea of having a kitten to love and nurture. Fast forward a couple of weeks and I'm still thrilled at having gotten a kitten...I just thought there was never a dull moment before...

In the past couple of weeks, Drew has reached several big milestones. Milestone #1 is that he now sleeps through the night!!!! Of course, since he doesn't get up 3 times, he makes up for it by waking up at 6:00 am, proceeding to wake the kitty up and then the two of them unleash all kinds of terror on Mommy and Daddy's peacefully sleeping selves. Its not much like having a baby...more like a preschooler (Drew) teaching his toddler sister (Lady Grey) what fun it is to climb furniture, throw toys around, pounce on Mommy and Daddy repeatedly in bed and screech at the top of your lungs. Milestone #2 is that he is completely out of diapers!! There is really isn't much to say about the cat in regards to this except that she appears to have a freakish interest in watching him pee.

So, the noise level has reached an all time high in recent days. I fight the urge to stay on top of Drew about not chasing the kitty because it turns out that she quite enjoys it and takes it rather personally when I make him play on his own. They even played football the other night. It went something like this: Drew would stand in one end of the room, he would chuck the soft, mini football (hey, I'm not completely retarded) into the other and then he and Lady raced to see who got there first. It was quite amusing to watch but even more amusing was Drew's prayer that evening. "Dear Jesus" he said, "Thank you for my new kitty! And Jesus? Please teach Lady Grey to know how to play football the right way so that she knows to catch it with her paws...Amen!"

At the moment, Drew is at preschool and the roofers are tearing apart our damaged roof. What is normally a quiet time, is not. Judging from Lady's literal attempt to climb the walls, I'm anticipating that between the roofers, the 3 year old monkey and a wild child of a kitten, I'm in for a rambunctious, loud, and quite possibly FANTASTIC day!

Drew-isms

It strikes me as funny that some of my friends check my status on Facebook just to see if there is something new that Drew has said. I guess that shouldn't really surprise me...he tends to draw a crowd wherever he goes (by force, if necessary). So, for those of you who are waiting to hear what my incredibly verbose child has said recently, I thought I would do another round of Drew-isms.

Recently, he's taken a liking to a minivan that belongs to a friend of ours. He informed us the other night at dinner that he was planning on borrowing it the next day. I calmly responded that it probably wasn't a good idea since he wasn't really old enough to drive...especially other people's cars. To which he responded, "Fine...I'll just buy it then." Jesse decided to humor him and ask him how much he was offering. Drew, quick as always, said, "26,500." After that we were able to dissuade him by explaining that was a little pricey for a used van.

We've had some concerns recently about his faith in God. A while back, he was laying in bed with me at naptime. "Mommy," he asked, "Does Jesus live in the sunshine?" I told him that Jesus was everywhere. "Well Mommy, what is He doing? Is he making me a baby sister yet?" I told him that when it was the right time, He would bless us with a baby sister. "Well, is He making me a puppy?" I explained that someday we might get a dog but it had to be the right dog at the right time. Clearly exasperated, he let out a big sigh and exclaimed, "Well is He at least making me a kitty!?!?" Once again, I told him that if it was the right kitty, at the right time then we would get one.

This conversation led to some serious discussion between Jesse and I, which eventually led to us deciding that next week, we are getting that child a kitten. When we told him this, he was super excited and started squealing, "Yay!!! Jesus finally made me a kitten!" Last night he prayed, "Thank you Jesus for Amy and Alan (our landlords) saying yes and thank you for my kitty and thank you and please let me bring her home soon!" Unfortunately, it appears that he has fallen in love with a kitten that won't be ready for a few weeks (give or take, in the words of the lady at the shelter)...something they neglected to make clear initially. So, at this point I'm praying that the kitten grows at an enormous speed in the next week so that she's big enough to be adopted. My little monkey is in a fragile place right now.

His preschool teacher told me a story about him last week. Apparently, each child has a job to do for the week. Last week it was one of the little girl's turn to be the greeter but she didn't want to do it. Mrs. Sandy asked Drew if he would like to be the greeter for her. Of course, he jumped up and announced, "I would LOVE to be the greeter!" and then proceeded to run up and down and give every one high fives. They gave him greeter duty again this week.

I guess his enthusiasm, as well as some other attributes definitely come from his Daddy. Before he even started preschool he told me that I was going to need to pack his Bible for him so that he could preach to all the other kids and at church on Sunday, he walked up to the preacher and said, "I'm going to preach the children in the nursery this morning...maybe soon I'll preach for you."

He apparently is determined to continue to act older than he is. Today at the library, a lady with a little girl with her asked Drew how old he was. He glanced over at the little girl who appeared to be around 3 or 4 and calmly said, "6."

That little monkey is funny, charming, quick on his feet and by some amazing miracle, mine.